Warp

INSIDIOUS

there is a stone inside of me

that i cant break; choked by

a ball in my mouth

that i cant swallow 

cant spit out

my anger has flowed to the gutter

along with the vomit of 

the whiskey and undigested kolkata

biryani

my beauty is that of the coward man

contained in his boundaries

defending the indefensible 

the clock ticks one two three 

second by second

the muscles slacken from age

the bones bend 

reminding me of me

the day loosing its scent 

the brightness turning into stuporous amber

till one day when nothing is left

i am face to face  with the stone

i try to cut it out

but its chained to my heart

the clocks tick 

i breathe

nothing happens.

 

Come, tell me how you live.

The moment in the photograph 
Was decision or serendipity? 
The photographer is being photographed 
Exposing our naked vulnerability-

Of never being authentic;never being fake
Ah! memory at the age of perfect counterfeit.
creating auto awesome stories of your taste
The closed circuit cameras that keep asking  

Come ,tell me how you live?

Where you put your dentures as you sleep?

Whom do you miss when you wake up?

Where you vanish when the light recedes?

Jigsaw falling into place

Black swans swimming ,

the dark waters of 

innocence and frailty
As the photographs 

in frozen hardwares

begin to  betray memory.

Books read since january

1.My Uncle Napoleon 3/5 stars- Farce is not a type of comedy that the new generation likes.
2.Season Of Migration to the north -4/5 stars- fighting imperialism with virility
3.White Noise(don delillo)-  Post Modernism and cultural theory apart
"Watching children sleep is the closest I can come to God"
5.Crime and Punishment-5/5 stars-but a return to Christianity after an Existential Crisis is just an option.
6. Introducing Time - A graphic Guide  5/5- Expand your horizon , you aantel.
7.The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle-Sweet Abysmal Confusion..fun 4/5 stars
8.Borges-Collected Fictions-6/5 stars!!!Get ready to be blown away. Savour slowly.
9.Five Little Pigs -Agatha Christie- 5/5 Does what it is supposed to do.
10.The grand Inquisitor-Part of The Brothers Karamazov-6/5 ..Again Blown Away.

Peace mayb

Reading Anton Chekhov's description Russian landscapes ,listening the Lonely Shepherd , thinking about time , realizing that I too am becoming past.

Insomnia

-I dont have the strength to keep writing this.To go on living with this feeling is painful beyond description. Isn't there someone kind enough to strangle me in my sleep?
 From Akutagawa's Spinning Gears.
(you have to read the whole story to get the feel though.Its seems rather mundane without the context.Anyways)

Devil

Innocence is imbecilic

When she is with him

It then craves her deeper depravity

In its arms.

Still innocent

It wants to hear her scream

The devil is in her silence.

Varuo

There is a place so big 

In our heart

That a  glimpse of it 

Strikes fear and awe

Of loosing ourselves and 

our small  individuality 

Oh to realize once again 

that divine loss

that endless fall

Fearing  that we may end up

loving that impossible all

Today On Stage

Time's deluge  merging into the sea of past
Its depth you cannot fathom
Everything you write is just a small torch light
Into the abyss
however
Today on stage are a few chrysanthemums from my balcony
Smiling at the rainy evening
And each gesture is also a goodbye.
Saying never again will it be like this.

Mary and Max

Beauty and all thats not beautiful but still very human...

You should not miss this simple bittersweet documentary of life 

http://m.imdb.com/title/tt0978762/

Edge of love

And how many times have you
thought like this?
That you could not sort

because you did not hide 

and didn't ignore the the other side.

Because you did not hide

private property and all
before  you set sail on the waves -
only guided by love and
the luminescent path of stars-

your was heart for sale then 

your house for the times to invade

Ah! to be blowing in the wind.

The ugliness when they discovered
you hiding your gold ring.

Who knew dreams were so selfish?

Who knew loving would be so hard?

Inside llewyn davis

Coens are my fav directors.True grit was an attempt at something different perhaps but

Inside llewyn davis marks a return to typical coen humour .

Highly recommended.Just dont expect much emo about 1960s New york folk music scene.luckily they dint fall into that trap.

Her

Spike Jonze's Her is perhaps the archetype of what overindulgence in arts and snobby sentimental crap brings.

By the way here is a song I am really liking 

Jesus etc by Wilco

http://youtu.be/59CDQb1wtV8

Tomorrow

Sons resembling their fathers 

Daughters born with grandma's

cheekbones

Oh how you have grown!

Listening to old country tunes

And reading pulp fiction.

As if in silence 

The river took its own decisions

Mellowing down and theorising

new looks at old fights

History is fancy dress nights.

I loose myself thinking 

Our lives are poems

For someone else to write.