September 24, 2014



there is a stone inside of me
that i cant break; choked by
a ball in my mouth
that i cant swallow 
cant spit out

my anger has flowed to the gutter
along with the vomit of 
the whiskey and undigested kolkata
my beauty is that of the coward man
contained in his boundaries
defending the indefensible 

the clock ticks one two three 
second by second
the muscles slacken from age
the bones bend 
reminding me of me
the day loosing its scent 
the brightness turning into stuporous amber

till one day when nothing is left
i am face to face  with the stone
i try to cut it out
but its chained to my heart

the clocks tick 
i breathe
nothing happens.


August 31, 2014

Come, tell me how you live.

The moment in the photograph 
Was decision or serendipity? 
The photographer is being photographed 
Exposing our naked vulnerability-

Of never being authentic;never being fake
Ah! memory at the age of perfect counterfeit.
creating auto awesome stories of your taste
The closed circuit cameras that keep asking  

Come ,tell me how you live?
Where you put your dentures as you sleep?
Whom do you miss when you wake up?
Where you vanish when the light recedes?

Jigsaw falling into place
Black swans swimming ,
the dark waters of 
innocence and frailty
As the photographs 
in frozen hardwares
begin to  betray memory.

May 6, 2014

Books read since january

1.My Uncle Napoleon 3/5 stars- Farce is not a type of comedy that the new generation likes.
2.Season Of Migration to the north -4/5 stars- fighting imperialism with virility
3.White Noise(don delillo)-  Post Modernism and cultural theory apart
"Watching children sleep is the closest I can come to God"
5.Crime and Punishment-5/5 stars-but a return to Christianity after an Existential Crisis is just an option.
6. Introducing Time - A graphic Guide  5/5- Expand your horizon , you aantel.
7.The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle-Sweet Abysmal 4/5 stars
8.Borges-Collected Fictions-6/5 stars!!!Get ready to be blown away. Savour slowly.
9.Five Little Pigs -Agatha Christie- 5/5 Does what it is supposed to do.
10.The grand Inquisitor-Part of The Brothers Karamazov-6/5 ..Again Blown Away.

April 3, 2014

Peace mayb

Reading Anton Chekhov's description Russian landscapes ,listening the Lonely Shepherd , thinking about time , realizing that I too am becoming past.

March 21, 2014


-I dont have the strength to keep writing this.To go on living with this feeling is painful beyond description. Isn't there someone kind enough to strangle me in my sleep?
 From Akutagawa's Spinning Gears.
(you have to read the whole story to get the feel though.Its seems rather mundane without the context.Anyways)

February 26, 2014


Innocence is imbecilic
When she is with him
It then craves her deeper depravity
In its arms.
Still innocent
It wants to hear her scream
The devil is in her silence.

February 25, 2014


There is a place so big 
In our heart
That a  glimpse of it 
Strikes fear and awe
Of loosing ourselves and 
our small  individuality 
Oh to realize once again 
that divine loss
that endless fall
Fearing  that we may end up
loving that impossible all

February 16, 2014

Today On Stage

Time's deluge  merging into the sea of past
Its depth you cannot fathom
Everything you write is just a small torch light
Into the abyss
Today on stage are a few chrysanthemums from my balcony
Smiling at the rainy evening
And each gesture is also a goodbye.
Saying never again will it be like this.

February 4, 2014

Mary and Max

Beauty and all thats not beautiful but still very human...

You should not miss this simple bittersweet documentary of life

January 27, 2014

Edge of love

And how many times have you
thought like this?
That you could not sort
because you did not hide 
and didn't ignore the the other side.

Because you did not hide
private property and all
before  you set sail on the waves -
only guided by love and
the luminescent path of stars-

your was heart for sale then 
your house for the times to invade
Ah! to be blowing in the wind.
The ugliness when they discovered
you hiding your gold ring.

Who knew dreams were so selfish?
Who knew loving would be so hard?

January 25, 2014

Inside llewyn davis

Coens are my fav directors.True grit was an attempt at something different perhaps but

Inside llewyn davis marks a return to typical coen humour .

Highly recommended.Just dont expect much emo about 1960s New york folk music scene.luckily they dint fall into that trap.

January 14, 2014


Spike Jonze's Her is perhaps the archetype of what overindulgence in arts and snobby sentimental crap brings.

By the way here is a song I am really liking 

Jesus etc by Wilco

January 11, 2014


Sons resembling their fathers 
Daughters born with grandma's
Oh how you have grown!
Listening to old country tunes
And reading pulp fiction.
As if in silence 
The river took its own decisions
Mellowing down and theorising
new looks at old fights
History is fancy dress nights.

I loose myself thinking 
Our lives are poems
For someone else to write.